Umpires are like mattresses: when they're good, you don't notice them. When they're infested with bed bugs and soiled with unidentifiable bodily fluids, then all of a sudden people start complaining. Umpires are also like snowflakes: each is unique in his own, beautiful way. But an interesting thing happens as you move down the chain, from the Majors to the Dominican Summer League to YMCA girls softball — the umpiring quality plummets, while the absurdity of the strike calls skyrockets. Scientists chalk it up to a concomitant rise in meth intake. Enjoy this supercut of super nutty umps.