This is better than when it starts snickering mid-mile.

Personalization is the future. Ads will know who you are, cars will auto-drive you home, and your workout equipment will viciously dissect your faults and tear your self-esteem to the ground. This is actually just a moderate-level insult; the machine also has settings for "Have you considered stomach stapling?" and "Notifying the EMTs now." On the other end of the spectrum, there's "If I compliment your abs will you stop working out today?" and "I'm not your real friend, adrenaline junkie."