While the parents of 11-year-old "singer-songwriter" Harper Gruzin may be defending this rendition of the national anthem, we are, thankfully, under no biological obligation to avoid hurling terms like "A Fate Worse Than Deaf", "Birth Control Advertisement", "Bush Era Terrorist Torture," "The Earpocalypse", "Earmageddon", "The Songlocaust", "Anthemicide", "An Audiological Weapon of Mass Earstruction", and/or "Verging on Treason" in the general direction of this three minute ode to turds. And Harper, if you're reading this, please know that we respect what you were trying to do but feel it's best for you and everyone else who isn't deaf that you invest in some voice lessons before your next gig. Either that, or become a famous movie star so you can have a music career regardless of how poorly you sing.