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Jockular
China
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SWIMMING
08/27/2012
Ryan Lochte's sister sets world record in offending an entire race.
"I live in a post-racial era in my mind where I rhyme Chinese with sinks & people love me."Our first question here should really be "why is Ryan Lochte's sister randomly...
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BASKETBALL
08/20/2012
Witness Kobe humiliate Chinese amateurs more than he's ever humiliated his wife.
If you have stage fright, you're supposed to imagine the audience naked. If you're Kobe Bryant and you're nervous about whether you can take Dwight Howard and the Lakers to the playoffs...
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JOCKULAR ORIGINAL
08/01/2012
New product lets you play half-assed badminton like an Olympian.
The badminton world is still reeling from the unprecedented match-throwing incident at the London Olympics, in which 8 players from the Chinese, South Korean and Indonesian teams were disqualified...
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LONDON OLYMPICS
08/01/2012
Photoshopper wins gold medal in imagining what Olympic divers look like while crapping.
Not unlike in Olympic diving, in Olympic Diver Dumping points will be awarded for shape and form, deducted for a large splash, and all divers will definitely need to shower off afterwards because...
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SOMEECARDS
07/18/2012
Made in China.
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SOCCER
06/25/2012
The hidden mortal danger of being a soccer fan.
Watching television can be a rigorous, exhausting activity. And if a spouse or parent ever tells you otherwise, perhaps in the context of using phrases like "get off the couch" and...
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BASKETBALL
05/22/2012
How to trade your dignity for a lifetime of free Chinese beer.
It was only a matter of time before a Chinese beer conglomerate conspired to taunt Yao Ming's highly visible former teammate Tracy McGrady in a silly commercial. Just add T-Mac to the list of...
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BASKETBALL
05/02/2012
Chinese textbook offers hilariously stereotypical description of every American.
If you weren't terrified of China before, let this reading exercise from what we can only assume is part of a central intelligence training manual change your mind. As you can clearly see, the...
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Older Posts
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Names
More of the worst human names in sports history.
Lists
New sports moments even more awkwardly erotic than the porn you're watching.
Health & Fitness
More dudes who are even worse at Photoshopping muscle than they are at building it.
London Olympics
New Olympic photos even more awkwardly erotic than the porn you just finished watching.
Soccer
The 16 best Mario Balotelli meme pictures you'll see in this list.
Lists
10 more of our favorite obnoxious sports fan signs.
Lists
More of the most absurd things ever seen at the gym aside from you.
Baseball
The 9 most gloriously obese gifs of Prince Fielder.
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Whiffleball
Insane whiffleball pitcher shows just how many ways other people are more talented than you.
Linsanity
Take a trip back in time to when the Naked Cowboy was a bigger deal than Jeremy Lin.
London Olympics
Olympic staffer caught on camera checking out Usain's Bolt.
Racing
Racer's awkward victory celebration will make you feel better about never winning anything.
Baseball
Johan Santana's no-hitter followed by post-game interview with teammate's penis.
Hockey
Boob-crazed cameraman does the double take of the century.
Basketball
Overly sensitive basketball announcer initiates one of the most awkward moments in television history.
World Records
Watch a new world record in pointlessness.
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Ozzie Guillen
michelle obama great. job. and. whit all my. respect she. look. great. congrats. to. her.
Johnny McNulty
Fundamentalists are right when they say the Fantasy genre is anti-Christian, since no one ever picks Tim Tebow.
Kevin Seccia
First fantasy football draft tonight! Don't know much about it but I'll be in full chain mail armor and will try to get all the unicorns!!
Michelle Wolf
My fantasy football team is where we're at a party and they say "you're funny and smart, I want to love you forever." Am I doing this right?
Jon Friedman
I play fantasy football because it is my fantasy to play football.
Alex Scordelis
Hey, who wants to hear about my fantasy football team? *the sound of everyone unfollowing me at once*
Jensen Karp
The real fantasy in my football league is that the other dudes w/ teams wouldn't have bullied me in middle school.
Ben Swanson
Fantasy Football draft! As usual, football made out of boobs goes No. 1 overall. #FantasyFootball
Aaron Fullerton
I'm a little nervous, I picked "humility" and "good sportsmanship" for my fantasy football team.
Rex Huppke
My fantasy football draft is tonight. Hoping to nab Tom Brady, a Minotaur, Jesus (with laser gun) and Paul Ryan's abs.
Ted Berg
Hey do you guys know if there's anyplace on the Internet or TV I can get tips and information regarding fantasy football?
Jen Statsky
So psyched it's (No I don't want to join your) Fantasy Football league season again!
Not Charles Barkley
MLB players, Lance Armstrong, and now Jersey Shore. It definitely don't pay to be takin them steroids.
Dan McQuade
It's kind of comforting that Phillies-Mets games have returned to their natural state of two bad teams playing each other.
Alex Mann
Fantasy football somehow makes having an argument with a teenager on a message board feel appropriate.
scharpling
I'm eating at a place where the guy in the next booth was legitimately laughing at a Michael Jordan underwear commercial.
MORE TWEETS »
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.
You're my favorite person to check for ticks.
I was going to drink tonight anyway but I'm happier it's because we're celebrating your birthday.
Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.
However old you are is the new 30.
I need a vacation from my vacation spent worrying about my dog in the kennel.
Happy birthday to someone who wasn't welcomed into the world via tweet or status update.
Let's drink tonight like we won the Powerball and then drink even more when we don't.
Your birthday is a painful reminder of how old I'm getting.
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The New 30
Note Cards (Pk of 10)
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Blow Jobs Flowers
Women's T-Shirt
$22.99
Happy Hour
Large Mug
$14.99
Work Feels Overwhelming
Journal
$12.99
Dating Profile
Magnet
$3.99
More Into Your Birthday
Greeting Card
$3.50
Four Figures A Year
Greeting Card
$3.50
140-Character-Or-Less
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Age Related Jokes
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