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Derek Fisher
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Playoff picture.
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Insane whiffleball pitcher shows just how many ways other people are more talented than you.
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Why you shouldn't plan extramarital affairs with coworkers on live TV.
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Ozzie Guillen
michelle obama great. job. and. whit all my. respect she. look. great. congrats. to. her.
Johnny McNulty
Fundamentalists are right when they say the Fantasy genre is anti-Christian, since no one ever picks Tim Tebow.
Kevin Seccia
First fantasy football draft tonight! Don't know much about it but I'll be in full chain mail armor and will try to get all the unicorns!!
Michelle Wolf
My fantasy football team is where we're at a party and they say "you're funny and smart, I want to love you forever." Am I doing this right?
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I can't believe it's already been a year since the last time I didn't buy you anything for your birthday.
I actually miss you.
Sex with you is so good that we should celebrate it by having sex.
However old you are is the new 30.
May your summer birthday be less hot and sticky than the moment of your birth.
A great way to show off your tan is to stand next to my stunningly white body.
You turn me on enough to consider having un-airconditioned sex.
We just wanted to let you know that we all sincerely enjoyed your vacation.
Happy birthday to someone I hope is my friend even when we're too senile to remember each other's birthdays.
I'm lost and weird without you here.
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