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BASKETBALL
10/02/2012
The most unofficially licensed NBA product on the market.
That's heroin, right? We're Internet nerds, so don't ask us.First, an obligitory display of minimal ethics: LeBron James is not really endorsing this heroin. These were found on a...
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SOMEECARDS
07/30/2012
Olympic losers.
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BASEBALL
06/20/2012
Most deranged voicemail ever links causes of drug use, abortion and gay marriage to Manny Ramirez.
In just 3 minutes and 39 seconds, a 69-year old woman and self-proclaimed non-fuddy-duddy reveals that Manny Ramirez's dreadlocks are the cause of steroid use, abortion and gay marriage. Although...
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BASEBALL
02/23/2012
Former MLBer demonstrates why you shouldn't watch Super Troopers immediately before driving high.
At one point in his career, Elijah Dukes was considered one of most promising young prospects in baseball. But while a series of on and off-the-field incidents may have derailed his career on the...
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COLLEGE FOOTBALL
01/04/2012
The Stanford Marching Band's 8 most marijuana-induced photo ops of all-time.
The Leland Stanford Junior University Marching Band is equal parts the pride and abomination of Stanford. Since abandoning all pretense of traditional marching almost 50 years ago, the band has been...
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New sports moments even more awkwardly erotic than the porn you're watching.
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New Olympic photos even more awkwardly erotic than the porn you just finished watching.
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More dudes who are even worse at Photoshopping muscle than they are at building it.
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Photoshopper wins gold medal in imagining what Olympic divers look like while crapping.
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The 16 best Mario Balotelli meme pictures you'll see in this list.
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12 awful Steelers tattoos that make you wonder whether there's something truly harmful in the water.
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See how not to take out your aggression on a tennis court.
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Johan Santana's no-hitter followed by post-game interview with teammate's penis.
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Overly sensitive basketball announcer initiates one of the most awkward moments in television history.
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Ozzie Guillen
michelle obama great. job. and. whit all my. respect she. look. great. congrats. to. her.
Johnny McNulty
Fundamentalists are right when they say the Fantasy genre is anti-Christian, since no one ever picks Tim Tebow.
Kevin Seccia
First fantasy football draft tonight! Don't know much about it but I'll be in full chain mail armor and will try to get all the unicorns!!
Michelle Wolf
My fantasy football team is where we're at a party and they say "you're funny and smart, I want to love you forever." Am I doing this right?
Jon Friedman
I play fantasy football because it is my fantasy to play football.
Alex Scordelis
Hey, who wants to hear about my fantasy football team? *the sound of everyone unfollowing me at once*
Jensen Karp
The real fantasy in my football league is that the other dudes w/ teams wouldn't have bullied me in middle school.
Ben Swanson
Fantasy Football draft! As usual, football made out of boobs goes No. 1 overall. #FantasyFootball
Aaron Fullerton
I'm a little nervous, I picked "humility" and "good sportsmanship" for my fantasy football team.
Rex Huppke
My fantasy football draft is tonight. Hoping to nab Tom Brady, a Minotaur, Jesus (with laser gun) and Paul Ryan's abs.
Ted Berg
Hey do you guys know if there's anyplace on the Internet or TV I can get tips and information regarding fantasy football?
Jen Statsky
So psyched it's (No I don't want to join your) Fantasy Football league season again!
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May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
Let's commemorate our departed WWII veterans by eating German frankfurters and Italian sausages.
Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.
However old you are is the new 30.
Just a heads up that I'm starting my summer diet which has probably ended by the time you're reading this.
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.
Happy birthday to someone who wasn't welcomed into the world via tweet or status update.
Just wanted to be the first one to wish you a happy birthday so I can feel superior to your other well-wishers.
I was going to drink tonight anyway but I'm happier it's because we're celebrating your birthday.
Happy 24 Hours of Constant Facebook Notifications Day.
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