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FOOTBALL
05/07/2012
See Eli Manning work out his severe sibling rivalry issues in this SNL commercial parody.
When athletes are given hosting duties on Saturday Night Live, their stilted performances can sometimes sink the show faster than an Italian cruise ship (TOPICAL!). Thankfully, Eli Manning scored a...
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BASEBALL
05/03/2012
The surest sign that the apocalypse is upon us.
The Book of Revelations describes four riders on horseback unleashed by Jesus to set a divine apocalypse upon the world as harbingers of the Last Judgment (i.e., the day we all go poof). From this...
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LISTS
04/04/2012
6 more hilariously absurd Taiwanese takes on American sports news.
Cheerleader Sex ScandalOf all the things made in Taiwan (rubber ducks, Chien-Ming Wang, those little plastic swords you get in club sandwiches), nothing compares in sheer usefulness to the CGI...
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NFL
03/16/2012
NFL feud quickly turns into pissing match.
Speculation that Jeremy Shockey might be eyeing a return to the Giants sparked a Twitter beef yesterday when Amani Toomer branded Shockey a "bad teammate" and "worse person." But...
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NFL
03/07/2012
What it looks like when wet cement vandalism turns into a permanent reminder of a team's failure.
If you're a Patriots fan, this is literally your "walk of shame."
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FOOTBALL
02/13/2012
How to completely overexpose your signature touchdown celebration during the Grammys telecast.
"The New York Giants won the Super Bowl! One of their receivers does a silly salsa dance when he scores touchdowns! Because he's Latino or something? I don't know, who cares. Let's...
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NFL
02/10/2012
The most painfully clear sign that it will be 8 months until football starts again.
Yep, NFL.com's top story today was about a monkey riding a dog. So hopefully you like baseball, NASCAR and/or squirrels who can do math, because if not, it's going to be a long offseason.
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FOOTBALL
02/09/2012
The exact vanity plate you shouldn't have while driving drunk.
It turns out there are some players on the Denver Broncos besides Tim Tebow, one of whom (Knowshon Moreno) was charged with a DUI this weekend after speeding through a construction zone more or less...
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SUPER BOWL
02/08/2012
The filthiest Super Bowl statistic of 2012.
According to a press release from PornHub (feel free to pretend you've never heard of and/or gotten a computer virus from it), right after the Patriots loss on Sunday, residents of Massachusetts...
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NFL
02/08/2012
How to win a Super Bowl and lose your mother's respect in one easy step.
After winning his first Super Bowl on Sunday, Giants linebacker Greg Jones surprised his girlfriend of 2 years with a diamond engagement ring and his mother of 23 years with the fact that he's...
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A con artist was arrested for impersonating Vince Young. His cover was blown when he actually got through his scam without getting injured.
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Cubs pitcher Kerry Wood is retiring after setting the Major League record for unfulfilled expectations.
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Big day for retirements, Kerry Wood and anyone who invested in Facebook.
Michelle Wolf
We get it Kobe, you're not Michael Jordan. You don't have to fall apart in the last minutes of a game to prove it to us.
Rachel Hastings
Skechers to pay $40 million to settle claims that Shape-Ups would aid weight loss. But the forgone dignity of the shoes' wearers: priceless.
The Fake ESPN
Mets to host 2013 MLB All-Star Game. The ballpark will be the only Met in attendance.
Andrés du Bouchet
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Michelle Wolf
Larry Bird is 1st to win MVP, Coach of the Year and Executive of the Year. If he commits a crime then he'll be the ultimate athlete.
Darrell La Montre
Kobe said recently in an interview that he doesn't take charges. I guess he forgot about the rape one.
Kris Liakos
New stadium! RT @mlb MLB, @Mets and NYC to make major joint announcement at 11:30 am ET.
Julian McCullough
100% of the OKC Thunder fans are wearing blue shirts. That kind of unity is only possible in a city where nothing else is going on.
Will Hines
This magazine is more like "Sports Photographed."
David Roth
I'm trying to find a spot to watch Clips/Spurs, and confronting the fact that most bars I like are Law and Order: SVU bars, not NBA bars.
The Fake ESPN
Kyrie Irving runaway winner of NBA RoY with 117 of 120 votes, revealing being a runaway is the only way to win something in Cleveland.
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