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Kids
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BASEBALL
10/11/2012
ADD kid will finally make you feel good about the effort you put into sports.
I wanna be a baseball star! Now I wanna be a movie star!In the time it takes you to read this sentence, you could have relived this child's entire sports career several times over. Don't...
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TWEET PICK
08/30/2012
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METTA WORLD PEACE
08/22/2012
Metta World Peace's appearance on Yo Gabba Gabba is almost as insane as Metta World Peace.
When you're wondering what the hell is wrong with young people in 20 years, remember this.Metta World Peace, aka Ron Artest, aka What The Hell, stopped by the set of Yo Gabba Gabba this week...
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FOOTBALL
08/14/2012
Texas Pee Wee league rules kid too gigantically gargantuan to play football.
They say he can only be seen if you truly believe in him or are looking anywhere near him.In what some are calling an injustice and most are calling "a second chance at life for the...
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SOCCER
07/30/2012
11-yr-old's rendition of national anthem so bad you'll forget she's eleven when callously laughing at her.
While the parents of 11-year-old "singer-songwriter" Harper Gruzin may be defending this rendition of the national anthem, we are, thankfully, under no biological obligation to avoid...
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COLLEGE SPORTS
07/09/2012
The last game parents should encourage their kids to play.
Yes, all of these children will inevitably grow up into booze-soaked, sex-starved college students and give each other the clap, but that's not for another four or five years! They already have a...
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GAMES
07/05/2012
The least compassionate father ever seen at a Chuck-E-Cheese.
How many tickets to get your brain cells back?This is practically a PSA for being an involved father: you never know when you are going to be able to point out to your kid how other children are...
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LONDON OLYMPICS
07/05/2012
The best attempt at stealing a priceless Olympic artifact you'll see today.
If you take as long to walk though England as the Olympic flame has, you're bound to be robbed by adorable orphans. We know they are orphans, of course, because they are small and British and...
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BASKETBALL
05/10/2012
10 hilariously painful reasons why you shouldn't use a chair to help you dunk a basketball.
It seems every few months, the media reports on a dangerous new teen phenomenon that's sweeping the nation. From chugging hand sanitizer to huffing refrigerants to soaking tampons in vodka,...
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NFL
04/25/2012
Football player's baby making abilities defy all laws of human procreation.
It's not unusual to hear about an athlete having illegitimate children with multiple women, but three illegitimate children with four different women? Wow. NFL prospect Janoris Jenkins may just...
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Older Posts
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Ozzie Guillen
michelle obama great. job. and. whit all my. respect she. look. great. congrats. to. her.
Johnny McNulty
Fundamentalists are right when they say the Fantasy genre is anti-Christian, since no one ever picks Tim Tebow.
Kevin Seccia
First fantasy football draft tonight! Don't know much about it but I'll be in full chain mail armor and will try to get all the unicorns!!
Michelle Wolf
My fantasy football team is where we're at a party and they say "you're funny and smart, I want to love you forever." Am I doing this right?
Jon Friedman
I play fantasy football because it is my fantasy to play football.
Alex Scordelis
Hey, who wants to hear about my fantasy football team? *the sound of everyone unfollowing me at once*
Jensen Karp
The real fantasy in my football league is that the other dudes w/ teams wouldn't have bullied me in middle school.
Ben Swanson
Fantasy Football draft! As usual, football made out of boobs goes No. 1 overall. #FantasyFootball
Aaron Fullerton
I'm a little nervous, I picked "humility" and "good sportsmanship" for my fantasy football team.
Rex Huppke
My fantasy football draft is tonight. Hoping to nab Tom Brady, a Minotaur, Jesus (with laser gun) and Paul Ryan's abs.
Ted Berg
Hey do you guys know if there's anyplace on the Internet or TV I can get tips and information regarding fantasy football?
Jen Statsky
So psyched it's (No I don't want to join your) Fantasy Football league season again!
Not Charles Barkley
MLB players, Lance Armstrong, and now Jersey Shore. It definitely don't pay to be takin them steroids.
Dan McQuade
It's kind of comforting that Phillies-Mets games have returned to their natural state of two bad teams playing each other.
Alex Mann
Fantasy football somehow makes having an argument with a teenager on a message board feel appropriate.
scharpling
I'm eating at a place where the guy in the next booth was legitimately laughing at a Michael Jordan underwear commercial.
Matt Goldich
I try to shower immediately after doing something gross like showering at the gym.
Seth Meyers
I can't believe Bartolo Colon got suspended for being 50.
Peyton's Head
For $350, I'm assuming Lebron's new Nikes come with your own child laborer.
Joe Praino
A newborn's soft spot #thingsmoredurablethanMikeVick
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Just a heads up that I'm starting my summer diet which has probably ended by the time you're reading this.
I can think of no better way to honor our fallen Civil War Union soldiers than by reminding Confederate flag-wavers that our current president is black.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
Happy birthday to one of the few people whose birthday I can remember without a Facebook reminder.
I was going to drink tonight anyway but I'm happier it's because we're celebrating your birthday.
Let's kick off summer with a holiday weekend that isn't warm enough for summer activities.
Love Coupon: Good for one back massage I'll immediately try and turn into sex.
The only thing I like taking off more than Summer Fridays is your bathing suit.
I hope bad weather doesn't ruin the Memorial Day plans I didn't make.
Happy 24 Hours of Constant Facebook Notifications Day.
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