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Jockular
Olympics
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SWIMMING
08/27/2012
Ryan Lochte's sister sets world record in offending an entire race.
"I live in a post-racial era in my mind where I rhyme Chinese with sinks & people love me."Our first question here should really be "why is Ryan Lochte's sister randomly...
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METTA WORLD PEACE
08/22/2012
Metta World Peace's appearance on Yo Gabba Gabba is almost as insane as Metta World Peace.
When you're wondering what the hell is wrong with young people in 20 years, remember this.Metta World Peace, aka Ron Artest, aka What The Hell, stopped by the set of Yo Gabba Gabba this week...
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LONDON OLYMPICS
08/15/2012
Gloating British Olympic team lip-syncs to 'Queen' so we'll pay attention to them for another 2:39
Don't stop me now! Just give attention, give me attention, oooh!Ok, Brits! You did a bang-up job hosting those Olympics, and we were all super impressed that you notched up the 3rd-highest...
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JOCKULAR ORIGINAL
08/13/2012
What it would look like if countries tweeted their final goodbyes to the 2012 Olympics.
United States of America (#1 - 104 medals, 46 gold)We really needed all that gold. Thanks for helping our debt, Mr. Phelps!We're all sad to see the Olympics fade into the mists of Bob...
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LONDON OLYMPICS
08/13/2012
Announcer confuses awkward billionaire for awkward millionaire who played him in a movie.
Everything this commentator knows about Facebook, he learned from the movie, the Social Network, starring Mark Zuckerberg as himself. Or maybe he just thinks all Jews look alike? Either way, pretty...
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LONDON OLYMPICS
08/12/2012
New Olympic photos even more awkwardly erotic than the porn you just finished watching.
This means it's a draw right?In ancient times, the Greeks competed in the Olympics naked. This is because they weren't fooling themselves about how incredibly sexual having thousands of...
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SOMEECARDS
08/10/2012
Olympic level boredom.
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SOMEECARDS
08/10/2012
Fat summer games.
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SPORTS TV GUIDE
08/10/2012
Sports you can watch from your sofa: August 10, 2012
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LONDON OLYMPICS
08/09/2012
Ignorant ESPN UK host calls Ireland 'a joke' for not playing with the rest of Britain.
Hello, I'm Russell Barwick and I've just volunteered to have my ass kicked by this lady."Ireland is a joke for not joining team GB. It's a whole Irish joke. It just makes no...
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Why you shouldn't plan extramarital affairs with coworkers on live TV.
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Ozzie Guillen
michelle obama great. job. and. whit all my. respect she. look. great. congrats. to. her.
Johnny McNulty
Fundamentalists are right when they say the Fantasy genre is anti-Christian, since no one ever picks Tim Tebow.
Kevin Seccia
First fantasy football draft tonight! Don't know much about it but I'll be in full chain mail armor and will try to get all the unicorns!!
Michelle Wolf
My fantasy football team is where we're at a party and they say "you're funny and smart, I want to love you forever." Am I doing this right?
Jon Friedman
I play fantasy football because it is my fantasy to play football.
Alex Scordelis
Hey, who wants to hear about my fantasy football team? *the sound of everyone unfollowing me at once*
Jensen Karp
The real fantasy in my football league is that the other dudes w/ teams wouldn't have bullied me in middle school.
Ben Swanson
Fantasy Football draft! As usual, football made out of boobs goes No. 1 overall. #FantasyFootball
Aaron Fullerton
I'm a little nervous, I picked "humility" and "good sportsmanship" for my fantasy football team.
Rex Huppke
My fantasy football draft is tonight. Hoping to nab Tom Brady, a Minotaur, Jesus (with laser gun) and Paul Ryan's abs.
Ted Berg
Hey do you guys know if there's anyplace on the Internet or TV I can get tips and information regarding fantasy football?
Jen Statsky
So psyched it's (No I don't want to join your) Fantasy Football league season again!
Not Charles Barkley
MLB players, Lance Armstrong, and now Jersey Shore. It definitely don't pay to be takin them steroids.
Dan McQuade
It's kind of comforting that Phillies-Mets games have returned to their natural state of two bad teams playing each other.
Alex Mann
Fantasy football somehow makes having an argument with a teenager on a message board feel appropriate.
scharpling
I'm eating at a place where the guy in the next booth was legitimately laughing at a Michael Jordan underwear commercial.
Matt Goldich
I try to shower immediately after doing something gross like showering at the gym.
Seth Meyers
I can't believe Bartolo Colon got suspended for being 50.
Peyton's Head
For $350, I'm assuming Lebron's new Nikes come with your own child laborer.
Joe Praino
A newborn's soft spot #thingsmoredurablethanMikeVick
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