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New sports moments even more awkwardly erotic than the porn you're watching.
Fans
12 awful Steelers tattoos that make you wonder whether there's something truly harmful in the water.
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Whiffleball
Insane whiffleball pitcher shows just how many ways other people are more talented than you.
Hockey
Boob-crazed cameraman does the double take of the century.
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Ozzie Guillen
michelle obama great. job. and. whit all my. respect she. look. great. congrats. to. her.
Johnny McNulty
Fundamentalists are right when they say the Fantasy genre is anti-Christian, since no one ever picks Tim Tebow.
Kevin Seccia
First fantasy football draft tonight! Don't know much about it but I'll be in full chain mail armor and will try to get all the unicorns!!
Michelle Wolf
My fantasy football team is where we're at a party and they say "you're funny and smart, I want to love you forever." Am I doing this right?
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Just a heads up that I'm starting my summer diet which has probably ended by the time you're reading this.
The only thing I like taking off more than Summer Fridays is your bathing suit.
I hope the new season of Arrested Development lives up to your expectations of being the best thing that's ever happened in your entire life.
May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
Let's kick off summer with a holiday weekend that isn't warm enough for summer activities.
If you were Jesus, today would be Christmas.
Let's spend Memorial Day weekend honoring a fallen sitcom that's back with 15 new episodes.
Love Coupon: Good for one back massage I'll immediately try and turn into sex.
However old you are is the new 30.
This Memorial Day weekend, I'd rather someone share their Netflix password with me than their beach house.
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